Running from Reality

Pain

2010-04-30T08:19:00.001-07:00

The recent events in my life have totally made me realize.
That happiness is but a mask that hides all the miserable things in life.
Once that mask is taken off.
The truth will break your very spirit.
You can keep trying to get up.
Only to find yourself falling back down again.
And each time you fall.
You will have a sense of regret and pain that will come together and crush you one day.

My happiness started breaking that day.
When the mask was taken off.
I found out some truths.
It was very painful.
I then knew how it feels to hear about your flaws everyday from everyone.
But never anything good from anyone.
Even 'you' always hit me with comments.
Do 'you' know how it feels?

Ever since that day.
I've begun to lose a lot.
I may have been rash at proving my point.
But have 'you' ever thought about what I said?
All 'you' ever think about is how wrong I am and how great 'you' are.
'You' are doing what 'you' said not to do.
If 'you' have something against me.
Just say it out.
But too bad.
Instead 'you' group together to kill me slowly.
I'm human too.
I'm just like 'you'.
So why am I treated like I am not part of it?

I'm so lost right now.
My sense of direction of what path I need to walk is gone.
The confidence I once have is now gone.
In my mind now.
Every sentence, every word I say.
Has to be thought through carefully before saying.
Every action, every decision.
Everything I do now will have second thoughts.
My reaction time has slowed down greatly.
I'm now useless at what I do.
All I can do now is act as if everything is all right.
As to not jeopardize others.

I've seen your attitude to me nowadays.
It has changed a lot since last time.
You direct everything at me.
Like I have hurt you in some way that cannot be forgiven.
It looks like I need to apologize.
But what can I apologize for when I don't even know what I did wrong?
Am I nothing but just trash in your eyes?

I've held and held and held.
I've seen improvement in some.
I've been changing myself.
But I'm still trash in your eyes aren't I?
I've done nothing but try to satisfy you.
I'm fed up.
If I have to be trash.
So be it.
I've been wanting to tell you off.
But I haven't.
Why?
Just so you can keep your face.
Your pride.

I can destroy 'you' now if I want.
I would open the doors to a world of nightmares.
It would kill 'you'.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A thousand is a lot isn't it?
A thousand pens, a thousand feathers.
Now how about a thousand bucks?
That's a lot isn't it.
Now how long does it take for a student to save a thousand?
It takes quite a long time of not eating a full meal and saving the money.
So how does it feel to let it get ripped out of your hands just because you have a conscience?
I felt guilty if I did not giving it up.
But I feel so pain to let it all be gone just like that.
It hurts to see you like that.
I wish I could see you like you once were.
Tough, energetic, proud.
Not sickly and weak.
You are the one I grew up looking up to.
So please.
Don't let me down.

Study?

2010-02-25T09:49:00.000-08:00

Can't get myself to sit down and study nowadays.
Really sucks. ==
Exams gonna fail arh!!
Die~
Exam is only a week away but I still don't feel pressured like I always did.
Dammit!
Even some of the laziest fellas I know are studying.
Boooo~

Recently watced Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief.
It's really good.
I think it's that way because I didn't read the book.
Haha.
The show is really for children.
But the effects were cool!
Especially all the mythical creatures.
Didn't really like the ending though.
It was so.... lame.

My mom's phone got stolen today and now I have to let her use mine.
Sigh.
I miss my phone! T.T

Hot!

2010-02-22T05:55:00.000-08:00

Stupid global warming.
Everyday here feels like a sauna.

So today is the 1st day back to school after the CNY holidays.
I spent most of the day doing something else besides study.
It went like this.
Morning I woke up late so rushed like a madman.
Then did assembly duty.
After that we had some kind of talk about drugs.
And so we skipped english period.
Then BM was a relief period.
Then after recess. 1 period of maths and I had to go out to do duty again.
And then after that was BC which there is no point listening to so I slept.
Man, that was a good sleep. =P
Then right before the school bell rang, I woke up and school was over. Yay!
Haha.

This hot weather is making it so nice to sleep in class.
It's a bitch to sleep at night though. So hot. ==
Save the Earth people! Global warming is a pain in the @ss.

5S1 dinner

2010-02-21T05:40:00.000-08:00

Woohoo~
Had a great time with my classmates on Friday.
Although abit expensive. ==
But still. It was a good night.

The guys

The girls

The family =]

There are more photos on Facebook. Stole these from the photographers. =P

Insomnia and Fame

2010-02-17T10:09:00.000-08:00

It's 2am and I can't sleep.
Stupid insomnia.
Been trying to sleep since 12am and I gave up and came here to blog.

So recently I watched the movie as shown above.
The movie is based on a few individuals and how they lived their lives while entering into a performing arts school to get famous.
It's slow moving and very dramatic.
But the quality of the acting is quite good.
I rate it 3.5 out of 5.
It's low because it was really too slow moving.
I had to force myself to stay awake throughout the first half of the movie.
But all in all it's a nice movie to kill time. =]

Oh well, that's all for now.
Gonna go back to trying to sleep!

Idiotic day

2010-02-06T07:48:00.000-08:00

So today is my school's "Merentas Desa".
In the morning, I woke up late so I rushed. Damn unlucky, forgot to bring some stuff for tuition later on ==
Rush liao then head to school.
Then after that we had to line up at the assembly grounds.
Waited for 2 idiotic hours just so the our turn to run came.
At least there were Jing Yuan, Li Shuo and Brandon to entertain.
And so we ran.
I kept on running and stopped only a few times.
Damn proud, lol. I'm usually damn lazy.
THEN....
the moment I entered the school gate ( not yet at end point ), time is up.
No points to be taken. Sigh.
WTH!
Damn sad lor. Zzz.

After that, some idiots... take liao things duno how to give back de.
Their system oso sohai de.
All of you very good meh?!?
Very big izzit?
Go die la.
Nobody was happy.
A lot were angry.
Some people should know who I'm talking about.
I feel sorry for those who got disqualified. Cheer up guys. We all know you are the real deal.

Then, tuition.
==
I didn't bring my homework because I was rushing this morning.
Dammit! I even did my homework this time. =_=
Ended up going home at 11pm.
So the day was like..
Morning - Running
Afternoon & Night - Tuition.
Damn tiring.
And I'm still pissed off with those idiots. Ruined my day.

Something new, something old

2010-02-03T06:44:00.000-08:00

After the constant few days of troubles, today was no different.
Just because it happened yesterday and day before doesn't mean you need to take it into account for today.
I mean they say "Never let the past control your future" so why the hell should you care about the past, just move on already!
This is something old, just let it go.

I learned something new from a friend today.

Anger leads to Blame,
Blame leads to Hurt,
Hurt leads to Fear,
Fear leads to Want,
Want leads to Responsibility,
Responsibility leads to Understanding,
Understanding leads to Appreciation.

I'm angry so I blame, as I blame I hurt myself because I want things to work out and I'm afraid it won't.
I'm required to be responsible for the fact that this problem is mine to solve and I need to understand and appreciate the meaning behind things because life is imperfect, nobody is perfect.

Thanks for the advice. I'll try to learn from it.

Never ending Nightmare

2010-02-01T04:50:00.001-08:00

It's unavoidable. It's a never ending cycle. My never ending nightmare.
Every single time I see or hear them argue. It's like I have a nail in my heart, piercing me.
They want to keep everything together, but do they know that they are just pushing me further away?
The more they continue, the more I want to go away.
It's so retarded.
Nobody to support me.
Nobody to understand what I'm going through.
It's like I'm stupidly waiting for something good to happen.
Which is so damn impossible.
Sigh.

When can I run away from this reality, this nightmare...

Expressing

2010-01-30T03:25:00.000-08:00

I'm finally back in blogging, not that I was actually active. Haha.
So it's a new year (actually it has been for awhile now) , I've now learned how much work there really is to do in my job. I'm happy I can skip classes. Haha.
The school created some idiotic points system. 20% of our marks in exams depends on our subject teachers. They will grade our attitude in class and our homework. This is just plain bad news, I hate doing my Chinese homework. Sigh~

Nowadays, I just feel so out of it. I don't have the "semangat" I had during the holidays to study. All I feel is that I want to just be myself without any worries. It's such a pain putting on a mask in front of everybody. I still have no idea what I want to do for the future. I have no proper ambition. I wonder how some people can just decide what they want to be just like that. I find myself disappointed as I look at what I have been doing throughout my life, I have accomplished little and wish for more.

I felt betrayed when I found some stuff out. I know they did it for the better but I wish they took the hard way instead of hiding. I wonder if I should tell them straight out that I know. It will hurt many but it might solve the problem. I'm so lost in this.

I read a poem online which I really find quite good, it goes like this:

Some people might say life sucks
or life is full of shit
While other people say life is beautiful
or life is full of surprises
I must say, I agree with all those
Life is whatever you think of it..and everything you think of it
Life is what you make it of it and what you say of it.

Life is about sadness
Life is about happiness
Life is about pain
Life is miserable
Life is about loss
Life is about smiling
Life is about crying
Life is about love
Life is about laughter
Life is about learning from your mistakes
Life is horrible
Life is dumb
Life is awesome
Life is depression
Life is tears
Life is sorrow
Life is anxiety
Life is Bullshit
Life stinks
Life sucks
I could go on and on and tell you all about life
But I'm not here to sort this out for you
cuz..
Life is all about you and how you treat it
You criticizes it...well, you're actually criticizing yourself
You like it, you hate it..well, its all up to you
Life is you so be careful how you describe it

Hungry?

2009-11-22T03:10:00.000-08:00

meow!

KY WAS HERE! x)

Dead blog

2009-11-20T09:53:00.001-08:00

Lol. My blog is close to dead I tell you. There's nothing interesting happening nowadays.
These are the stuff that have happened these few days.
Nov 6-7 we went to Jeram Besu just to relax. Photos on facebook.
Nov 8 we had our class party as well as Matthew's farewell. Sad man, gonna miss him.
Nov 15- my bday, this is the most boring birthday ever man. -_- I stayed at home and went out for dinner with my family. Everybody was so busy, so couldn't go out. =\
Now, nothing to do. Sigh. It's so boring.... My blog is going to be SO dead.
Anyways,
Matthew is gonna be leaving soon, gonna miss you Matt, you and your lame-ness. Class is going to be boring without you next year, anyways, good luck and take care of yourself in New Zealand. =]
See ya!

2009-10-30T09:39:00.000-07:00

Recently all classes are just plain boring and practically not teaching anymore.
Dunno what's the point in going to school.

Not bad I guess. Very tiring. That's all I can say about today.
Had quite a crazy time with all of them today.

I kicked Narong's ass in reversi and some sort of jumping games that's like checkers.
Jenning introduced it to me. xD

Sigh.

Why do we have to argue so much?
You know you are important to me, so why?

I hope things get better, it's very hard to be like this.

Cycling!

2009-10-12T07:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was another day of cycling.

Damn fun man.

Hope we can go another time.
It started of like this.
We met up at TTC at 11am.
Zhen Yuan was the latest. =_=
Can't blame him though, he had a marathon in the morning.

We left for Taman Pertanian at Shah Alam about 11.30 and reached at about 12.
I think.
1st thing we did was choose our bikes.
Mine was blue.
Haha.
The brakes were damn nice.

And then we cycled! =)

Alot of going up and down although we took the "Easy" road.

The other road would have been steeper.

Going downhill was the best!
The wind blowing at you while you move damn fast.
Feels like flying! (Although I don't know how it feels to fly, I ain't a bird!)
We made quite a few stops.
They were either to visit the places around there or to take a break.
There are pics down there to show where we have been.

By the end of all the cycling.
We were all damn tired.
Zhen Yuan probably spent every last energy he had left.
Joshua and Subendran went to "pak toh" alot. Haha.
They always left together before us. GAY! xD
Chen was quite active today.
Yann Ju wasn't THAT active today. =P
E-Lynn finally knows how to ride a bike properly! Gratz! (Now if only my ice skating was like that. =P)
And the rest were all half-dead. Tired ma.

All in all, I had a great time.
I really can't get tired of this place.
Here are the pics!

Go Go Go!

My bike is the blue one!

At the bridge!

Taking a break.

Going up the tower.

Yann Ju and I.

All of us!

I had great fun guys.
Thanks!

Finally updating.

2009-10-10T11:11:00.000-07:00

So, after not updating for so long. I finally decide to write something. Haha.
To stop ppl from complaining that my blog is dead.

Alright.
So recently we have been having exams.
I've been studying hard, well sort of. =P
It's so damn stupid.
We had 2 days of exam, then 10 days of holiday, then 5 days of exam, then the weekend, then another 2 days and we reach to today.
It's holidays again!
After this is another 2 days of exam and then another 4 days of holiday. =_="
So many holidays!
Really hoping that my studies will improve la.
Feeling as though I did quite bad during the exam.
Ah well! What's past is past.

On the Tuesday that just passed,
we had PMR duty.
I really enjoyed it for some reason.
I just didn't like that there was a form 2 LKT that was talking like he's all that and the teachers kept wanting us to wash this and that.
Lazy ma! >.<

The form 1 and form 2 were quite good.
Quite 'guai'. =D
Finally gave the project to the form 2 to do. Yay! Tugasan finally have it's own board. ^^
This duty was quite successful if I may say so myself.
I think, all 15 of us actually enjoyed it alot for once.
Great job guys! =)

I finally got a bunch of new books to read. Haha. I'm happy.
The best way for me to forget all my worries, listen to music while reading a good book. =D
I went to Mid Valley 3 times this week. Crazy ain't it?
And I ended up in MPH and Borders all 3 times. Haha.
I feel abit lifeless.
But I like books, I can't help it. (Not schoolbooks)

Today, I did a MSN drawing!
Haha.
It was to cheer a friend up.

Have a look!

Penguin says, "Dun cry!"
*Drawn on MSN*

Lol.
Tomorrow going cycling with TTC group again. =D
Hope it'll be fun.
Will update once I have time.

2009-09-06T06:14:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling.
very left out actually.
very alone.
thats all I have to say for now.

Whatever.

2009-08-31T06:21:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling very pissed.
ARGH!
!@(@#&!*@!)(@*!@!@!&*!@!#!&*^!!!!!!
Sigh.
Dulan.
I can't do anything again.

TTC outing

2009-08-28T03:18:00.000-07:00

Today.
Went out with the TTC group.
To Bkt. Cahaya Taman Pertanian
Lol.
Jian Wen, Jia Yi and Liang Jie. (Tutors)
Myself, Elynn, Chen, Eu Ming and Subendran.
8 ppl.

Went there at 7.10am. (So early...)
Thought I was late coz Jian Wen said 7am.
But turned out I was the 1st one there. ==
Then so stupid de is that Chen just woke up at that time. (Wth~!)
and then he took his time and came at 9am.
We were stuck waiting for him.

We got there, paid RM3(entrance fee) and wanted to rent the bikes.
But....
That fella there said it was puasa so they open later. -.-
Bikes were only available at 11.30am. 0.o
So we walked up the hill and then came down
then we took a bus tour around the place.
11.30am.
We finally got our bikes!
Ahaha.
But we had to teach Elynn, Chen and Eu Ming how to ride a bike.
It was quite a different experience.
Subendran lan ci us the moment he got his bike.
Riding here riding there doing tricks. Swt~
After we taught abit.
Chen managed to ride already. (Genius arh?!)
Elynn n Eu Ming at least knew how to go forward although still not that good at balancing.

We went up to certain areas in the place after that.
Then while resting.
Eu Ming n Elynn practiced riding again.
Lol.
Elynn managed to balance and ride for a very long time.
She was quite happy.
Suben n Liang Jie went off dunno where coz they were too bored waiting. == (Jerks!)

After riding for awhile more. (already 2 hours + gone)
We returned the bikes. (2.30pm already!)
Then we went to a place called
"The four season house"
Damn did we get cheated.
They only showed us spring.
SWT!
But it was damn cooling in there.
Good place to rest after riding bikes for so long. (Going up slopes were damn tiring)

Next.
Time to makan!
Lol.
3pm d.
Went to @siacafe.
Ate lunch. (So late ==)
Then went back to TTC.
Today was quite fun la.

As usual when I went home
My family just had to ruin my day.
But what the heck.
I dun really give a damn anymore.

~Thanks guys for the good day!~

Good day bad night

2009-08-28T03:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday went to Sunway with
Brandon, Mav, Li Shuo, Sukesh. (damn gay weih)
Ok la.
It was quite fun with them just that we kena ffk by Matthew.
Idiot~
Watched "UP".
Quite funny but it was abit boring as well.
Li Shuo kena zat by Brandon n Mav like hell weih.
Damn funny.
Only thing that sucked was whn i went home.
Kena marah over nth again.
Sigh.
Wth.

being lame

2009-08-26T09:50:00.001-07:00

Alot of ppl are complaining that there aren't many updates.
SO!

IT IS NOW UPDATED.

nah!
update liao la.
=="

Currently still being in the lousy mood I have been for the past week.

Life's all about lying

2009-08-23T05:55:00.000-07:00

I hide behind a mask
You can't see my face
Looking at first glance
I'm in a happy place
The truth is, that's a lie
But you can't really tell
that in the back of my mind
I think that my life is like hell
What's the point of living
If we are all going to die
What's the point of being happy
If in the end we're going to cry
But this is something no one sees
This is something no one knows
And yet deep inside of me
This feeling of hatred grows
So even though this mask reveals a happy side of me,
I use the mask as a shield to look at what others can never see.

2009-08-21T04:25:00.000-07:00

I hate asking.
So tell what is wrong straight away.

I guess I don't deserve this or anything else.

Unavoidable truth

2009-08-18T05:35:00.000-07:00

*Do not read if you can't stand ppl being emo.

Well. It's back. My constant emo-ness. I guess everybody were right when they said I'm always emo. I've been trying very hard. VERY very hard to try to look at things another way. To be happier. But I can't take it anymore! I'm even taking it out on my friends who are innocent. I feel like a total @ss for being that way. Brandon n Mav keep saying I'm a lucky fella. I think it's quite a load of crap. If I'm that lucky then I would be happy right? People ask why I don't want to go home? It's because that is where my life is like hell. Everytime I'm at home. I feel like I have no where else to go, I'm invisible. I'm constantly getting screwed for NO FKING reason. My fault arh that mom is like that? My fault that dad is angry? I'm a freaking punching bag for both of you. I don't exist in your world where both of you think you are superior. Let's take last Friday for instance. I had a great day because of LM. The moment I came home I got scolding like as though I burned the house or something. All of you just ruined my day just like that. ONE DAY. Can't you idiots just don't disturb me for one fking day?!?!? All of you want to be like that? Then whatever! Have it your way. I'm tired of being like a freaking slave to both of you. You can choose when you want to have your own meal, count me out. You can choose to argue and I'll just stand there and treat it as bullshit. You hit me, I lock my door. You ban me from computer, I'll work to buy a laptop. You don't let me go out, I'll take bus myself. I don't care anymore if I look like a delinquent to you. I want to enjoy my life! It's really unavoidable that my life is miserable thanks to both of you. I thank you for bringing me into this world but I really hate you for making my life so miserable. It was just a mistake that he made. Why can't both of you just get over it and move on? You are acting like 10 year old kids who cannot get over a grudge. It is so idiotic. I'm not mature but I feel like I'm better than both of you who are like IDIOTS! Life is just not fair. Is this what I'm going to have to live with all the time? I'll keep controlling myself from taking it out on my friends who are always there for me unlike you two. But I hope they don't blame me if my attitude changes after this. That is. Becoming more and more unsocial. Sorry.

*I really wish I could die right now.

LM installation

2009-08-16T00:18:00.000-07:00

I know this is abit late but...
Installation was great!
Well at first everybody was damn nervous/scared/rush...
then it got better and it was damn fun.
xD
I'm really glad the form 4 came.
I really miss them.
The memories I got from them are priceless.
Chze Zheng damn funny la.
Want to put badge oso act so gay.
I hope you like my present la. =D
Brandon n Li Shuo.
You guys are the best man!
I don't think I could have been so high kei if you guys werent there.
Remember always come for duty arh.
Then can high kei somemore. Haha.
Yu Xun.
I really wish you won't go.
But your studies come first.
So, take care and remember to come back and visit us.
Never forget us!

Well.
I don't have any pics.
If you want to see them.
Go to Wei Ling's blog.
I'm too lazy to upload. =P

To: Everyone [Committees n form 4]
*I'm really thankful to all of you for everything you have done.

Happy birthday to you!

2009-08-08T09:00:00.001-07:00

Today we celebrated Xie Thong's and Pi Lian's bday.
The pics arent with me but it was really funny.
Damn yu~ at one point.
I went in and then someone forgot to turn off the fan.
It turned and blew out the candles.
Then all of us laugh like mad.
Lol.
Damn funny la that time.
After that we 'rewind' and redo.
xD
Then I took a piece of cake and *SPLAT!*
Xie Thong had a face with cake.
*I would have used the whole cake if the others didnt want to eat it so badly*
After that there was cake on faces and ppl running away everywhere.
Damn crazy.
=D
Cleaned up after playing around n eating cake.
After that then serious do stuff lor...
Now all I wanna say is

HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIE THONG & PI LIAN!!

Sushi mania!

2009-08-02T04:58:00.000-07:00

Yay.
I made sushi today.
Not bad lar.
Although some look abit cacat.
Taste still good. =D
Took alot of hardwork and time.
Quite satisfied.

Unagi (Eel) and Crabstick + cucumber sushi

not bad right?

some look abit cacat. damn hard to make ok?

Nice... =D

Makan time! I look retarded. I know.

Next time have to make them look nicer.
This time at least taste still good. =D

Feeling....???

2009-07-31T07:02:00.000-07:00

It still hasnt sunk in.
What that has happen that is.
I still feel like how I did yesterday.
Well.
It will most probably hit me soon.
Lol.
I just wanna say thanks to all those who supported me.
I hope that all of us can still be friends.
We will all miss you guys damn alot if you quit.

Well.
I'm going to miss 08/09 de committees.
They really have taught me alot.
Guided us thru everything.
It feels like I just only gotten close to them and now....
Sigh.
I'm looking forward to working with 09/10 de committees.
We will go thru thick n thin together.
And take on all the challenges n suprises that come along.

Once again.
Thanks to all of u that supported me.
Thanks to the committees that gave me this chance.
I'll try my best. ^^

Sad.

2009-07-30T00:19:00.001-07:00

So sad...
Only one more day...
I wish we had one more duty...
With all of us working together...
Can laugh n go crazy...
I will miss the craziness of all of us working together.
We will be tired after duty but we could still laugh because of each other.
After tomorrow.
Things are bound to change.
I really hope that nothing changes after tomorrow.
Regardless of what happens.
I hope we are all still together no matter what.
Good luck to all yeah.

We memang gila!

2009-07-25T09:10:00.001-07:00

Lol. Today we crazy de. xD
Even though it is duty,
we still can be so high.
Haha.
Morning we came at 8.30am like that.
We all met up at Kanna.
Stupid waiter there didnt want to take our order no matter how many times we called them.
So idiotic. ==
We were fed up so went to 7-11 bought some stuff then go to school.
We waited at foyer DK then went to the hall when Chze Zheng came.
There, we practiced and practiced and practiced for arranging the chairs for the concert at night.
Sounds like hardwork right?
We still laughed through it. ^^
After practicing, we, the guys were allowed to rest till 5pm.
Instead of resting we played football.
Haha.
Even more tiring.
But we still can play till gila-gila de.
I went backstage with the girls because Kristy had something bad to tell me.
Sigh.
After listening then I feel....
I wanna kill A & B la!!! (Some of you know who liao la!)
After that.
We play around abit and then duty again!
After that C told some serious thing that made me feel guilty.
Duno if it is me or not. =\
I never meant any harm and I don't even know if I did those things at all.
Brandon n others cheered me up then we duty lagi. Haha.
Waliao. This part then high kei man.
Ahem.
Before duty Wei Ling saw something....
All those carrying platforms de will know. xD
Wei Ling malu ler. Haha.
1st thing we did was carrying the platforms down.
Qi Hong and I had to take one big round and go to the other side of the stage to put our platform.
After that was expanding.
Qi Hong timed for us.
49 secs! Yay!
Then Qi Hong, Narong and I became switch-men.
We had to turn on lights at the correct moment.
And my duty was done just like that.
We had to wait for the rest to finish then all of us went into the hall to watch the remaining of the concert.
We damn dai b.
When it came to the song 'Heal the world'.
Qi Hong, Brandon, Jia Yong, Li Shuo and I sang along and waved our hands.
The moment the concert ended.
Duty lagi!
This time we lebih high even though we were abit tired.
After stacking all the chairs and check labels.
About 30 mins (according to Qi Hong).
1300 chairs all went down into the basement. ^^
Then we carried 2 side benches down from the stage to the side of the hall.
After doing ALL that.
We still had energy to run from hall to DK!
Haha.
Not bad right?
Sounds like our energy is endless.

I really can't be without this bunch of people.
They cheer me up no matter in what situation.
Even hardwork duty can be fun whenever we are together.
Go LM! ^^

2009-07-23T05:11:00.001-07:00

Lol.
Today duty syok!
We managed to arrange the chairs before the time limit (1 min weih!)
Whole day didnt have to enter class.
Entered 5 mins before last period ended to piss the teacher off.
Haha.

I walked back home after stopping at the bus stop near my house.
Suprisingly I saw Kai Sheng ( primary school friend )
Talked abit with him and then we go yam cha.
Lol.
He belanja. xD
After that said goodbye and went home.
It was good seeing you again.
You were the last person I expected to see today. xD

Bye bye Aaron.

2009-07-23T05:05:00.000-07:00

Sad.
Today Aaron ( you know which Aaron you are ) is leaving M'sia and going to UK.
Gonna miss his constant annoying insults n lame jokes. xD
Thanks for everything you helped me with. ^^
Good luck man! Hope you achieve success!
When you come back better treat me to a meal.
Haha.
See ya!

Harry Potter

2009-07-17T06:24:00.000-07:00

Went out with a bunch of friends yesterday to MV to watch Harry Potter.
A total of 21 of us went ==. Gila!!
After school a few of us went to MV first.
While waiting at bus stop we saw a few committee.
Then a funny thing happened.
Huey In and I asked where were we going at the same time.
Lol.
Everybody was going to MV.
At MV,
we ate at food court.
(Kristy was slow at eating weih...)
Then we waited at GSC there.
Jia Yong was close to late ==
Everybody was waiting for him.
Dumb Dumb la he.
Then we watched Harry Potter.
Whole cinema about half of it are from CHS.
Lol.
Might as well book the whole cinema for us.
I rate this movie.
2.5 out of 5 stars....
It wasn't that great.
Dramatic but also boring la.
==
All in all,
It was quite a good day.
But then the movie wasnt all that great.

Books!

2009-07-12T07:57:00.000-07:00

Got a few new books today.
Yay!
Haha.
I've recently gotten a liking to books.
My mum scolded me for buying so many.
But what the heck!
I like reading so I buy books to read!

Hyper!

2009-07-12T07:45:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was great!
Went to Tanjung Sepat.
We were all damn high wei.
We kept screaming and being gay. xD
Committees were hyper too.
Especially Chze Zheng... He is super gay! Especially in the bus back. Haha.
Narong, Huey In, Huey Shin were taking pictures the whole day.
Qi Hong and I did quite alot of gaying.
Kai Xiang and Li Shuo too.
Unexpectedly Qi Yan got into the mood to play with us too. xD
There were quite alot of lame jokes too. ( From Jun Yang & others )
To describe this trip in one word.
FUN!!!!

I'm waiting for the pics.....

Tagged by LK

2009-07-10T05:36:00.000-07:00

1. The person who tag you : Ley Kuan

2. Your relationship with him/her is : Form 2 friend

3. Your first impression of him/her is : Prefects are annoying? (Sorry la xP)

4. The most memorable moments with he/she is : Going out to KLCC? Boleh remember tak?

5. The most memorable thing he/she has said to you is : I duno. Dun remember.

7. If he/she became your lover, what should he/she improve that : be happier?

8. If he/she becomes your enemy, what will you do : Ignore.

9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be : Some problem la. Dunno till it really happens right?

10. The most desired things you want to do for him/her now is : Beat her in a test == haha.

11. Your overall impression on him/her is : Smart. A prefect. A friend.

12. The characteristic you hate most about yourself : Being emo.

13. The most ideal person you want to be is : Me.

14. For people who care and love you, say something to them : Thanks.

15. Pass this quiz to 10 people who want to know how they feel about you :-
1. Narongrit
2. Li Yin
3. Kristy
4. Amy
5. Shern Li
6. Xiao Ying
7. Wen Yiang
8. Ka Yean
9. Li Shuo
10.Ee Ying

16. Who is 6 having relationship with : No one I think.

17. Is 9 a male or a female : I can't tell the diff. xD haha. male la. I think. =P

18. What is 2 studying at the moment : I don't see her 24/7 so how am I suppose to know?

19. Who was the last person you had a chat with : 9

20. What kind of music does 8 like : I'm not sure. I'm guessing. Soothing?

21. Does 1 have any sibling : Don't think so.

22. Is 4 single? No

23. What is the surname of 5 : Yeoh

24. What's the hobby of 3 : Writing stories. Reading books and annoying me.

25. Do 7 and 9 get along well? Yeah. I think so.

26. Where is 10 studying at : CHS.

27. Say something casual about your eyes : black

28. Have you tried developing feelings for 2 : No way. Somebody will kill me.

29. Where does 9 lives? I forgot.

30. What colour does 4 like : Ask her.

31. Are 5 and 1 good friends : Erm. Not good. But friends I guess.

32. Does 2 like 7? Duno if they even know each other.

33. How did you get to know 8? LM and 4S1!

34. Does 3 have any pets? I have no idea.

35. Is 7 the sexiest person in the world? NO!

36. Are you sexy? No

37. What am i doing now : Being annoyed by tags.

Tagged by Amy

2009-07-10T05:25:00.000-07:00

RULE 1: You can only say Guilty or Innocent.
RULE 2: You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks! ( So, if you want an explanation.. Please comment.)

Now, here's what you're supposed to do... And please do not spoil the fun. Copy and paste this into your notes , delete my answers, type in your answers and tag 20 of your friends to answer this. Then see what happens.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Asked someone to marry you?
Innocent.

Kissed one of your Facebook friends?
Guilty

Danced on a table in a bar?
Innocent

Ever told a lie?
Guilty

Had feelings for someone whom you can't have back?
Guilty

Ever kissed someone of the same sex?
Innocent

Kissed a picture?
Innocent

Slept in until 5 PM?
Guilty

Fallen asleep at work/school?
Guilty

Held a snake?
Guilty

Been suspended from school?
Guilty

Worked at a fast food restaurant?
Innocent

Stolen from a store?
Guilty

Been fired from a job?
Innocent

Done something you regret?
Guilty

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?
Innocent

Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
Innocent

Kissed in the rain?
Guilty

Sat on a roof top?
Guilty

Kissed someone you shouldn't?
Innocent

Sang in the shower?
Guilty

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?
Guilty

Shaved your head?
Innocent

Slept naked?
Innocent

Had a boxing membership?
Innocent

Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
Guilty

Been in a band?
Innocent

Shot a gun?
Innocent

Donated Blood?
Innocent

Eaten alligator meat?
Innocent

Eaten cheesecake?
Guilty

Still love someone you shouldn't?
Innocent

Have/had a tattoo?
Innocent

Liked someone, but will never tell who?
Guilty

Been too honest?
Guilty

Ruined a surprise?
Innocent

Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you can't walk afterwards?
Guilty

Erased someone in your friends list?
Guilty

Dressed in a woman's clothes (if your a guy) or man's clothes (if your a girl)?
Innocent

Joined a pageant?
Innocent

Been told that you're handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said?
Innocent

Had communication with your ex?
Guilty

Dating Someone?
Innocent

Get totally drunk one night and you have an important exam tomorrow morning?
Innocent

A total stranger treat you by paying your public transportation fare?
Guilty

Get totally angry that you cried so hard?
Innocent

I'm Tagging:
1. Kristy
2. Narongrit
3. Li Yin

On a hold

2009-06-30T05:07:00.000-07:00

Ok
I've recently gotten quite moody due to certain reasons.
I'll blog about it when I feel better.
But for now.
This blog is on hold.
Sigh.

-Yhlow-

Tagged by Quack

2009-06-22T05:21:00.000-07:00

1. The person who tagged you : Quack

2. Your relationship with him/her is : Just friends

3. Your first impression of him/her is : Rich! haha

4. The most memorable moments with he/she is : Camp?

5. The most memorable thing he/she has said to you is : Nth?? 0.o

7. If he/she became your lover, what should he/she improve that : Nth. Coz it won't happen!

8. If he/she becomes your enemy, what will you do : Stay away? I duno la!

9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be : Got problem la of coz. If not why become enemy 4?

10. The most desired things you want to do for him/her now is : Drop a bucket of water on her! xD Then see her get angry. haha.

11. Your overall impression on him/her is : Crazy....

12. The characteristic you hate most about yourself : Thinking too much???

13. The most ideal person you want to be is : Happy go lucky without a care in the world

14. For people who care and love you, say something to them : 1st. Who are u? 2nd. Thank you.

Tagging....
Xiao Ying & Kristy

Lost

2009-06-21T09:38:00.000-07:00

Haven't been posting for quite awhile.
Exams, exams and more exams.
Lol.
I can say that I pretty much screwed my exams. ==
Why did I screw my exams?
Coz I couldn't get myself to study.
This post is kinda emo.....
Don't nag at me if it is........

I don't know why.
I feel very lost.
Like I just can't find a meaning to doing anything anymore.
I know I need to study
but whenever I open the book.
I just stare and nothing enters.
There were times where I could study
But that was just luck that I had the mood to do it.

Even when I try to sleep.
I still feel meaningless.
Questions come to me.
Memories flood in me.
I remember happy memories.
I remember very bad memories.
I laugh. I get mad. No~I don't cry
I ask myself, Why am I doing this?
Is there any point in me being here?
Why do I even care?

Even when I'm with my friends.
I talk to them
I go crazy with them
I act gay with Qi Hong in front of my other friends.
I still feel like one person.
Even though there are so many.
I feel like I'm there but at the same time invisible to everything around me.

I can get scolded by my parents for absolutely no reason
and I feel nothing.
Just emptiness in me.

To me now.
I don't know what to hope for the next day.
I don't look back.
But I just can't seem to look forward either.
I'm not sad but I'm not happy.
I'm confused.
I'm lost.

Why do I feel like this?

~People are walking around me,
~I can see them.
~People are talking to me,
~I can hear them.
~People are all around me,
~I can feel them.
~With so many people around me,
~why am I so alone?

Wishes to my friends

2009-06-07T10:06:00.000-07:00

This post will be to wish all my friends. ^^

To Derek (June 2nd)
Happy birthday dude! I'll never forget how I met ya. You hit me on the head! Moron. xD But at least I managed to make you fall on your butt. Haha. Well. May your wishes come true!

To Melissa and Jun Ming (June 4th)
Happy anniversary! 5 years cpl. Crazy. Haha. You guys were meant for each other la. Remember to invite me to your wedding when the time comes. Haha. xP Don't poke me arh Melissa. Or I'll gay with Jun Ming. xP

To Shern Li (June 7th)
Happy birthday Er Jie! I didn't know you much till we became a team for camp. I don't regret meeting you, you are a great leader and a great friend. =) May your wishes come true and that you are always happy. I really miss camp, don't you? >.< PS: Don't be too crazy over glitter la So Po. Haha.

To Yee Er (June 9th)
Happy birthday! Although I don't know you that well. But still. All the best! Hope you had a great day.

That's all for now. Happy birthday! and/or Happy Anniversary guys! ^^

Side Effects

2009-06-05T21:45:00.000-07:00

Haha.
Lately experiencing some side effects from camp.
Not that they are bad.
=P

Let's see...
Aha!
I have a cold and sore throat.
Ok.
That's not good.
But who cares. xD

What I really meant by side effects is that I can't seem to stop remembering what we did in camp.
I keep remembering.
Everything.
From preparation before camp.
From day 1 to day 3 of camp.
And keep laughing while I remember. xD
I remember how Rong Yao kept stopping Huey In from seeing our flag. Haha.
I remember how we kept chatting throughout the process of preparing our shirts.
I remember how high Shern Li was when the glitter was a success. Lol. Crazy girl.
I remember how we cheered for each other, no matter how hard the challenge.
I remember my group laughing when Huey In kept getting interupted by Rong Yao.
I remember how high everybody was when it came to water.
I remember how we danced like crazy animals over and over again.
I remember how good it felt when we managed to finish task by task.
I remember how it felt like to be with them all, my group, other groups, the committee, the teachers.
I can't seem to stop remembering.
Weird huh?
xD
I really miss them all.
I wished camp didn't end.
I miss Ah Ma, Ah Pa, Biao Jie, Da Jie, Er Jie, San Jie, Da Mei, Sai Mui, Er Ge, Sai Lou.
All of them supported me through this camp.
Sigh.
Well.
Back to reality.
Exams are here.
==
Sad.
I wonder if I can ever experience the joy I had in this camp again?

All of Us!

2009-06-04T09:37:00.001-07:00

Unforgetable memories

2009-06-04T00:29:00.000-07:00

I came back from camp yesterday.
Was too exhausted.
That's why I'm only blogging about it today.
xD

It was tough.
Hard.
Tiring.
I was like suffering.
Well.
Only abit.
It wasn't that bad.

Honestly,
I had the time of my life during camp.
The amount of experience I got there.
You can't imagine.
It's gonna sound pathetic
But it's the 1st camp I've ever been too in my life.
><
I learned alot.
Enjoyed alot.
Even being in the forest was fun.
Not scary like I imagined.
I bonded with my friends.
My teammates.
At times the committee played with us.
Brandon, Qi Hong, Rong Yao and everyone else.
We all played in the water.
Damn shuang!
Can't believe I did that underwater bumping thing...
Had to do it under command and the command was...
Down~
Down~
Down~
Down~
Up any time.
Couldn't breathe.
But still.
FUN!
Hahaha.
I must be crazy.

During camp, we had to face many challeges.
My team and I met them head on.
It was interesting, exciting although tiring and sometimes painful (if there were punishments)

My group had a variety of people
Each special in their own way.
They are.

Shern Li (Er Jie)
Our group leader. Smart, Always smiling, Kind, Nice to talk to and a good leader. She never fails to make everyone feel like part of the team.

Rong Yao (Sai Lou)
Our assistant group leader. Funny, lame, social, always happy and a kind fella. He lacks abit of self confidence but through what I saw during camp, he did really well. His lame jokes really releases everybody's tension when we are stressed and he makes everybody laugh all the time.
It's because of him that our group can laugh even when times are hard for us.

Yee Hliang (Da Ge)
Well, myself la. Dunno what to write. xD

Shao Wei (San Jie)
She's creative. I'll admit that. Some of her ideas are really out of this world but they all make our team different. Our tepukan and song were mostly by her.

Li Shuen (Sai Mui)
She's really like our youngest sister. She's responsible and funny. She argues with Rong Yao alot.
Haha. Really like sister and brother la those two. Really funny to see.

Yi Wen (Da Mei)
Talks alot, abit lazy but knows when to be serious and responsible too. Although not many ideas but when she does give one. It's a good one. For example is the glitter on our flag and shirts, the idea was hers and it really made a big difference from good to great.

Feng Jia (Da Jie)
Quiet, responsible, honest but also the same as Yi Wen, seldom give idea but when she does, it's a good one as well. She keeps quiet and listens to what we have to say. She thinks things through clearly and then only gives her opinion.

Jia Yong (Er Ge)
This fella leh, alot of ideas, although mostly very useless. xD He is funny but sometimes not serious enough. I find him easy to live with. He is quite creative, he tied a torchlight to the tent and it bcame our lightbulb. It was so much easier to see then.

Well, these 8 people are in the group Lilac Flames and I don't regret being in this group at all. Not even the slightest bit.

Overall, I will never forget the memories and experience I got from this camp and I will never forget these great teammates and friends I had and have. I'm very lucky to have all of them in my life. I'm very lucky to have experienced this camp.

Our slogan
The Everlasting Flame, WE ARE THE LILAC FLAMES!!!
and don't you forget it!!! =P

What's been going on

2009-05-24T05:54:00.000-07:00

Ok.
So I havent touch my blog in awhile.
Have been busy with LM lately.
In the PURPLE team for the camp.
Go PURPLE!
Damn happy.
My teammates are easy to get along with.
Feeling that I'm very lucky. *haha. lucky bastard again*
We finished our shirts and part of our flag yesterday.
FINALLY.
Lol. =D

So now we reach to today.
Which started out as a normal day.
I had Sej extra class in the morning.
I thought it started at 9am so I went there at 9am ==
Then when I reached there.
Oh crap!
It starts at 10am instead.
Lucky thing my tutor LJ was there.
He belanja makan. xD
Then 10am,
start tuition.
It was ok. I didnt sleep! Amazingly. Haha
After that was Maths.
My tutor, A. was scaring the hell out of everyone bcoz of his fierceness. xD
It was funny la.
Seeing all of them so quiet.
Then some stuff happened which I'm not gonna post.
So tuition ended at 5pm.
My mum said she'll be there at 6pm.
So I wait.
Then she said 6.45pm, then at 7pm she told me 15 more mins.
In the end she took me home at 7.45pm instead.
WTH!
Damn bloody annoying.
Can't take me home then say can't la.
Don't make me wait like an idiot for nearly 3 hours.
Sigh.
Annoyed.
Now have to finish Sivik project somemore.
==
Lazy~

Two faces

2009-05-15T07:31:00.000-07:00

Today
Teachers day.
I'm not saying prefects did a bad job.
All I'm saying was that I didnt understand your thing that looked like a christmas tree
And the things after tat were quite boring.
I really wished we got the job instead.
I was so looking forward to it.

Besides that,
Camp briefing.
So many things cant bring
so many things have to bring.
wth.
How many bags do I have to bring?

THEN,
Got scolding la
Quite alot really
I expected it
But I was so tired from standing and sitting so much
It went abit like >>>>>
Yee Hliang Stand,
@%*&*@&*%(@&%*@(&%*@
@%*(@&%(*@&(@
Sit.
Yee Hliang Stand,
@%&*@(&%(*@&(*&@(*&(@(*&
@%&(*@&*(@&(@(*(*(@
Sit.
Yee Hliang Stand,
@#%@$@#@#**&@#@#@#$@#
#$@*&*&##@**@#@#**(&*&((
Sit. ==
*&*@#@*&*@#&*@&#*@&@*&#
The committee's were so diff from usual
Scolding at every chance available
Abit loud.
=\
But it's ok la.
I did quite alot of wrongs.
I had to control myself a few times...
Nearly talked back.
Like bringing trouble to myself only.
Sigh.

OH CRAP!
FORGOT TO TAKE PICTURE!
LI SHUO WENT BACK EARLY! T.T

I'm sorry to all of my fellow members for whatever I did wrong.
Thanks to all of you for your cooperation.
I'm damn lucky to have been your ketua.
Throughout this project.
I have turned from my lazy self to somewhat more responsible ( dont dare call myself responsible xD)
I met new friends.
I had a chance to do something I never can learn anywhere else.
Crap.
I really wish I could turn back time and go back to the times we had before the project was over.
Although busy abit.
But it was so damn fun with all of you.
Sigh.
Miss it alot.
And last but not least
To the committee as well...
For giving me this chance.
Thank you.

Happy Mother's Day!

2009-05-10T03:59:00.000-07:00

To my mother(s) and the mothers around the world

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! =D

LM is the best!

2009-04-30T05:45:00.001-07:00

Yay~
Today play until like gila.
Within 15 mins and we carried all the chairs down to the basement.
Kept lining up in straight lines like scouts or KRS.
I got scratched abit but I dont care.
It was really really fun.
Sangat syok!
The committee praised us.
It felt damn good.
LM Boleh!
xD

I saw her today.
It kinda hurt me.
But at least I feel better.
That I apologized.
Now.
I'm like nothing to her.
And she's happy with that.
So I don't mind.

Haha.
Today took Xiao Ying up to TTC.
She kept asking.
Are u sure they won't kick me out?
Can I eat up there?
And others.
1st time I saw someone ask so many questions.
After that teman her wait for her auntie and turns out the auntie was waiting for her already.
Then she complained she would get scolding.
Really funny la she.

Learned a new quote today.
Dream that you'll live forever, live like you'll die today.
It's somewhat meaningful to me.
Don't know why.
But it is.
I'm damn weird. xD

Thank you!

2009-04-24T04:46:00.001-07:00

Yay!
LM Anniversary was quite good.
Everything went as planned except for that damned slideshow.
I should have checked on Thursday. =\
Ah well.

Here is what I wanna say.

To
The food bahagian
All of you made everything really terrific.
I saw the food and it looked delicious. (That's all I could do. Look. Not Eat. xD)

Thanks.(For making lunch so enjoyable for everyone)
and
No Thanks. (For making me so hungry T.T)

To
The games bahagian
Although a little bit messy in between.
I saw that most of them enjoyed the games.
Thanks!

To
The present bahagian
Cookies were great! (I did a part of it too btw. xD haha)
Notebook designs were good.
Thanks!

To
The invitation bahagian (ex-committee & committee+teachers)

You all did a good job! Thanks!

To
The drama bahagian
Nice acting!
Everyone enjoyed it.
Thanks for the hard work practicing!

To
The Cleaning up bahagian
Good job!
All of you managed to keep the place in top shape.
Thanks!

Last but not least

To
Everyone else in the anniversary group
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

I'm sorry if I did anything wrong to while as the ketua. Forgive me if I insulted any of you in any way while conducting meetings and such. Thanks very much!

Cookies anyone?

2009-04-12T04:04:00.001-07:00

Ok.
Today we made some cookies in my house.
Sounds very gay right?
Lol.
I was sort of forced to make my house available because none of the places of actual people who are suppose to do it were free.
Ah well.
At least it was fun.
Especially when there are people like Kai Xiang, Kristy, Bi Hui and others.
He kept giving funny though unneeded comments.
So lame la he.
He nearly kena slap by Bi Hui.
So scary. xD
Well.
At least in the end.
The cookies came out successfully.
The last batch was the best one.
By 5pm.
Everybody left.
I had to clean up part of the remaining mess.
And then I got scolded out of nowhere when my parents came home. =\
My whole day that was suppose to be enjoyable went *poof*.
Whatever la.
Oh ya.
Btw.
I'm not jealous ok?
U know who you are when I say this.
Lol.

-Untitled post- xD

2009-04-02T06:14:00.000-07:00

I didn't know I was that scary.
xD
I was annoyed during the time.
By 2 ppl whom I shall not name.
Today meeting.
I was particularly fiercer for some reason.
Mayb I was just pissed off.
It was funny though.
It was because of my "fierceness" that ppl started listening somehow.
And we pretty much have planned everything that we need for that day to be quite good.
Only thing is if the damn proposal will get approved or not.
It's such an idiotic reason to not let ppl have their fun on a weekday just bcoz of p&p.
It's not like ppl actually study.
The only ppl that will get pissed are the teachers.
The students don't wanna study and the teachers blame us. =\
Ah.
Watever la.
We'll show them that we can carry out that day successfully even though there are so many limits.
I'm sure that day will be as good as it can be.
I believe in my group, they are a bunch of people u can really trust.
Thankful for being able to be working with them.